5 Ways to Feel Good About Your Relationship with Money

A guest blog from Kate Northrup, author of the new book "Money: A Love Story"

by Kris Ward

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Money-A-Love-StoryYou’re going to interact with money every day pretty much for the rest of your life.

For most people, money is a cause of stress, anxiety, fear, shame, guilt, and worry.

But what if your relationship with money were a source of joy, positivity, and even love?

Since we have to deal with money on a daily basis, why not make it feel good?

After all, we tend to make decisions in our lives based on moving toward what feels good and moving away from what doesn’t.

If we know that what we put our attention on grows, then we need to put our attention on our money if we want it to grow (from a making, giving, and receiving perspective). If we make putting our attention on our money feel good, then we’ll be more likely to do it!

Here are 5 practical ways to feel better in relationship to your money (so that you’ll be way more likely to pay attention to it):

1 – Gratitude. I used to be a chronic avoider. I racked up over $20K in debt because I didn’t pay attention to what I spent, what I had, or what I earned. I needed to start really small when it came to paying attention to my money because I had so much resistance. I started doing a daily morning practice of checking my bank account balance after my meditation. As I did this, I focused on gratitude for the ways in which my life was abundant. As a result, my income began to increase because I was consciously feeling gratitude for the money I already had.

2 – Giving. Studies show that giving money away or spending it on others actually makes us feel happier. It affirms abundance in our lives, as well. Whether you decide on a set percentage of your income, like 10 percent, or another amount that feels good to you, giving keeps you in the flow of abundance. Giving away some money or acting generous in some other way is one of the fastest ways to turn around feelings of lack or financial anxiety. Remember, “When you’re feeling helpless, help someone.”

3 – Spending on what you value. Money is simply a stand-in for what we value. One of the easiest ways to simplify spending decisions is to clarify our values. When we spend money only on what we value, we get a lot more emotional bang for our buck. For example, if I don’t care much about cars and I spend $30K on a new car, I’m not going to feel particularly nourished by that expense. If I really value travel, however, and I spend $3K on an around-the-world ticket, I’m going to get ongoing emotional returns on that investment. When we spend only on what we value we’re able to spend less money to get more satisfaction.

4 – Value yourself. We earn money in exchange for the value we provide for others. The best way to increase your ability to provide value to others is to learn to value yourself more. When we own our own worth, others see us as worthy too (and they pay us more!). A great way to start this practice is to keep a journal of ways that you add value to the world and write 3 new things in it each night.

5 – Make it feel good. In order to keep showing up for our money we have to make it feel good to do so. Doing things like renaming your bills “Invoices for Blessings Already Received” and calling your financial meetings with yourself or your partner “Financial Freedom Dates” are great ways to do this. Find ways to make the practice of paying attention to your money and taking positive action steps toward financial well-being feel good so that you’ll keep showing up for your own abundance.


Kate Northrup is the author of the new book Money: A Love Story. She’s leading a live online event with guest teacher, DailyWorth.com founder Amanda Steinberg called A Course in Having Enough. The course is free when you purchase Money: A Love Story. Get details at www.moneyalovestory.com.

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Kris Ward
Kris Ward is a Lifestyle Design Coach™ Trainer and the president and founder of AbundantYogi.com. She has helped to educate and inspire over 100,000 people worldwide out of painful conflict around money, self-sabotage, and inhibited self-expression into having the freedom and abundance to do what they love every day, and ...read more

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Read 3 comments

  1. stella

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  2. Kelly Edmonds

    Thank you for sharing your positve ways for working with money. It’s such an emotional aspect of our life. I need to keep reminding myself money is just energy to attract and respect.

  3. Caroline Frenette Intuitive Leadership Coach

    Make it feel good! Yes!

    I purchased the book and I’m really enjoying it. It’s fun to read and packed with actionable (and fun) homework 🙂