Disclaimer: As you might’ve guessed from the title, my potty mouth gets carried away in this post. There’s good reason for it, but still… read at your own risk. 😉
This past weekend was the first ever Abundant Yogi Live.
I have to say, I’m deeply satisfied with how it all came together and how the whole experience played out.
Especially when I read all the comments on the AY Facebook page and see that everyone got so close from this one weekend that they’re all talking about how much they now miss their new sisters! I love it.
The space was perfect, the yoga was blissful, the hip hop class was off the hook, the speakers were spot on, the breakthroughs were PALPABLE.
All has been kittens and butterflies… until Tuesday morning hit.
If you weren’t at AY Live you wouldn’t even know it––but if you WERE there, you’d know I had a big announcement and launch planned for Tuesday 11/1.
Something I’ve been working towards for over 2 years now.
I won’t ruin the surprise and divulge too much about it, but I will tell you it’s a certification for Lifestyle Design Coaching.
I was more excited about it than anything I’d ever done in my business. Ever.
And the shit didn’t happen.
The launch I mean. Here we are two days later and as I write this, it’s still not live.
Don’t ask me what happened, ‘cuz I’m still not even clear on that part. Just know it has to do with having:
- a ridiculously full marketing calendar (that got condensed even more so when I got pregnant in order to factor in time to have a freaking baby!),
- some turnover with my web team,
- a crap-load of technical difficulties, and overall,
- less than ideal communication.
My team and I… MOST of the time we’re like a well oiled machine. But like everyone, we still have our learning to do.
Anywho, back to my story. Shit didn’t happen. Or rather it DID.
It hit the fan and splattered all over the place.
And what came up in me, it wasn’t pretty (ahh, the mystery of the interior when it sneaks up).
See, I’d been working my lil’ bootie off preparing for this launch. And I was all proud and happy because I’d gotten all of MY parts done EARLY. Before AY Live even.
It was all cued up and ready to go on my end. We were more prepared for this launch than all the launches we’ve ever done.
Or so I thought.
When things didn’t go as planned, at first I kept my cool. Probably because I thought, “Anh, no biggie, we’ll go live in an hour or two.”
I practiced what I preach, used all the tools in my “stay present, stay downstream” toolbox.
But then after that hour passed, and another hour passed, and then a whole day, and another day… I was beyond pissed!
After all, I’m a PRO. I’d just told a room full of people including the core of my clients and colleagues to watch for Tuesday’s launch––that it was gonna be FAB.
And I had done MY part. (Cue inner dialogue)
It was my coder who dropped the ball because she was on vacation and couldn’t get to a solid Internet connection (that, and a bunch of other reasons I didn’t really understand).
How dare she?
Because of her… I was gonna look like I didn’t have my shit together, and that sucked.
Because of her… I was gonna let people down, break promises, step outside of integrity.
Because of her….
And my monkey mind just kept spinning out. I was resisting like crazy (which was only making me feel powerless).
The more I blamed her, the crappier I felt, and the more powerless I felt.
I cried. I screamed. I vented.
Then finally I put my damn shoes on, headed out the door and just RAN until my feet hit the ocean.
I pulled out the best tool I have for moving energy and letting go of resistance.
THE GET OUT’s!
If you don’t know what the get out’s are, you’re about to receive a HUGE blessing.
I can’t take credit for them. I learned them from my friend Josh Pais, professional actor and creator of Committed Impulse.
Here’s how you do the get out’s:
- Stand naturally, with your feet hip width apart and knees soft
- Bend your elbows and bring your hands up by your chest, palms facing forward (like a standing chaturanga––lowered plank pose)
- With a deep, LOUD, full voice, yell “Get out!” at least 10 times, simultaneously pumping your arms out forward as though you’re shoving someone away from you with each GET OUT
Energy will MOVE. Stuff will vibrate and flap around inside. You’ll probably feel embarrassed, ridiculous, exposed… it might be kinda scary.
The mysteries of your interior may get dislodged, stirred up.
It’s okay. This is what you want.
This is your truth right now. It’s what’s alive in you on a sensation level––not on a Monkey Mind level.
From here you can discover what hurts, what your needs are, what kind of support you need. Most of all, you can see clearly enough to know how to nourish yourself.
And as soon as you get back to nourishing yourself, you’ll have your power back.
And when you have your power back, anything is possible. You’re no longer the victim.
So then guess what happened…
I came home, hugged my husband, rinsed the sand off my feet, and made myself some tea.
Rather than beating myself up for my anger outburst and how that energy might’ve affected little Rhythm, my unborn child, I had a chat with the little guy and explained to him how important it is that we honor our emotions and get them out.
Then I opened my computer and typed the following Skype message to my coder:Hey… I’ve finally surrendered and accepted that this launch will go out when it goes out. I’m done resisting. Now I’m trying to focus on what I need to feel nourished and feel okay that this has happened. I’m working on getting that nourishment and taking the pressure off. I thought I’d ask you too, what do you need now to feel nourished?
She never got the message.
She had felt so bad that she didn’t get the launch site completed that she pulled MORE THAN an all-nighter to try and get us back on track. I didn’t know exactly what was going on because her Internet connection was spotty and she wasn’t communicating regularly.
As a result of not taking care of herself and hustling to try to fix things, she ended up in the ER with an asthma attack.
Man, did I feel like a raging bitch?
Thank goodness I wasn’t still sending her “Is it done yet?” messages when I got the news from another of our team members.
As I type this she’s at home resting, safe and sound. For that I am so grateful.
Work. Getting the job done. Meeting the deadlines. NONE of this is worth sacrificing our precious health.
Or for that matter, pinching ourselves off from our own flow of well-being. From that unwavering trust that all is well, that we are held by something so much greater than what we can see.
The launches, the show, the presentation, the performance, the big announcement…. all that will be here waiting on us once we’re back in our downstream flow.
Lesson learned yet again: “Nothing you want is upstream.” Not launches, not deadlines, not even keeping promises. All of it is downstream. We can’t reach it if we keep resisting and paddling upstream.
Thanks Abraham-Hicks for that timeless truth.
This was a HUGE wake-up call for me. I hope that my sharing it helped you in some way as well.
If it has, please tell me so. I so honor your feedback and never intend for this to be a one-way conversation.
Here’s to the downstream flow.
All my love,
P.S. Yes, the Lifestyle Design Coaching Certification is still going down. Tomorrow maybe? The day after perhaps… It’ll make its way into the world when it is most needed. I can’t wait to share it with you.